The 3 E's of Mentorship: Empowering the Next Generation with Cifford Higgins

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Coming up on this episode of the
healthy, wealthy, and wise podcast.

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My mint green model is, um, it's,
it's, I refer to it as the three E's

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welcome to the healthy, wealthy,
and wise podcast with Dr.

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William T.

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Choctaw, MD, JD, where the doctor
helps you unlock your full potential

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by equipping you with the tools and
knowledge in the areas of health, wealth,

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and wisdom anchored in his experience
as a business executive, a physician in

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the surveyor for the joint commission.

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A former mayor and over 50 years
of experience as a general surgeon.

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You've got questions, he's got answers.

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So let's get started.

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Here's Dr.

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William t Choctaw, md

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jd.

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Well, one of the things that I've noticed,
so I've always thought, and you can

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correct me on this, when I was growing
up, most of the teachers were women.

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Very, very, I saw very, very few
men teachers in my, in my school,

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uh, junior high, high school.

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And I went to one of those schools
that went from first to the 12th grade,

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you know, it's the same building.

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You just, you went to one side and
then you went around the hall and the

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other side was, was the high school.

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And, and my point is, and I, I
grew up in Nashville, Tennessee.

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My school was like a hundred percent
African American and, and I'm, I'm

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thinking about role models, you know,
that, that we boys had, you know,

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You know, particularly those maybe
who didn't have fathers in the home.

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And that's why I think your work
and the work that you're doing now

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is so good because that's exactly
what's needed, particularly getting

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our young people to go to college or
letting them know that they can go to

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college and, and, and get a degree.

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Because if you, in my opinion, if
you don't get through that door, then

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everything else becomes impossible.

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10 times more difficult for you regardless
of who you are or how smart you are.

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Yes,

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yes, no, no, you're absolutely right.

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And I, I, and, and that's, I'm glad
you mentioned that because my mentoring

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model, okay, is, um, it's, it's, I
refer to it as the three E's, okay.

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Evaluate, evaluate, educate, then elevate.

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And so, um, that's how I'm
going to start, um, my mentoring

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programs and activities is.

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You know, evaluate our teams,
you know, assess, find out what

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their needs are, find out where
they are at this point in time.

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Not all of them, uh,
have the same background.

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And so you want to get to know them.

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And so, you know, you want
to be able to reach them.

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Okay.

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And the only way you can do that is to
evaluate them, you know, Find out what are

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the things that are pushing their buttons.

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What are the things that, you
know, that triggers them, you

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know, uh, what's going on with them
currently at their, at their time.

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And so I came with that mentoring
out of it starts with an

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evaluation and actually evaluation.

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Then you can educate them.

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Yes, this is where I can utilize my
skills, skills, some other mentors.

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Dr.

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Chaka, I'll maybe call on
you to, you know, uh, I'd be

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happy to help.

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You just let, let me know.

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Absolutely.

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But, but after the evaluation
is called you educate, okay.

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Now, and you educate them by
demonstration, by modeling, you

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know, there are so many just.

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uh, skills, skill sets that a lot of
our young people don't have today.

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Now, granted, partially it's because
they're so involved in the technology

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and they're sitting there, perhaps right
now, we speak maybe in their bedroom on

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their cell phone, you know, going through
a lot of different social media apps.

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But what about all those skills that
are out there that you and I, you know,

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um, grew up on those, those lost skills.

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Those are lost skills that need to be
our young people need to be trained.

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I get, I, uh, I, uh, I get teased a lot
by my, my, my, my, uh, my daughters,

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you know, Because, you know, when they
begin dating, you know, what's the

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ideal man for that particular person?

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And so I get ridiculed by my daughters
and some of my, my relatives because

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I said, well, you know, that man
that you dated, he should be able

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to know how to, Change a flat tire.

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So, so, so if you travel the world and,
and, and, and you, and you brought a

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flat tire, would you be able to get
out there and change a flat tire?

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So, you're way out of school, huh?

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Well, I'm going to use that as kind of
an example, but you know, you got triple

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A now, so if you just call triple A.

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And then they'll say, those cars,
the tires repair themselves.

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Exactly, yeah.

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But, but still though, I think
that just, you know, You know, that

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develops you as becoming a man, you
know, our teenagers to understand.

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I won't be so much old school,
but still I just want to be able

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to meet them where they are.

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Right.

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Right.

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And educate them.

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And then after you educate
them, you elevate them.

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And then, you know, you promote
them, you recognize their

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compliments, the achievements.

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And then also this will come up with,
like you said, I believe, like you

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said, you know, they should be elevated
to be able to go to college and go

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into directly into the workforce.

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Okay.

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You talk about skills.

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Okay.

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You know, um, you don't necessarily
have to have a four year degree from

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a primary university training school.

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You know, you can make a very good living
out of going to like a trade school, and

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some of our young people, they are so
skillful and a lot of things that they

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do, but you can direct them into, you
know, hey, you know what, you're good

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with your mechanics, you go with your
hands, you know, why don't you put that,

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you know, in technology, put that used
to maybe going to trade school, maybe

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a college and living in a dorm is not
perhaps for you, that's okay, but still,

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you know, direct them to somewhere else
where now they can elevate, they know

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you're going to elevate their lives.

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And so that's the my mentoring model.

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Are you at the stage with your
organization where members of the public

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are helping you or is that down the road?

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Or if someone listening to you now,
um, say in New York and say, you

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know, that sounds like a great idea.

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And they want to help or they
want to get more information.

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What would you say to them?

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Okay, so I am at the what we use the
term the infancy stage of my nonprofit.

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Okay, I'm just days away
from launching my website.

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All right.

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And once the website is live, then,
you know, um, I can, uh, then begin,

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you know, like you said, send out the
information, how they can reach me, how

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they can contact me through my website.

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Um, and so that's where I am right now.

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So, uh, I have had those, I have a board
of, um, you know, board of directors.

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And one thing I'm learning about,
this is new for me as well.

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And, and starting a
nonprofit organization.

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And so I'm looking to obviously
secure sponsorships, grants.

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You know, donations, you know,
for my mentoring activities.

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But, you know, I'm anxious
about getting going.

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In fact, I have to have, you know,
my structure in place, you know,

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my board, you know, they want
to ensure everything's in place.

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And so they did give me permission to
launch what I refer to as an unofficial.

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Mentoring activity.

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So back in April, I took a group of
teens to a HBCU night at the Clippers.

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There was HBCU night at the crypto.

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com.

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Okay.

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That was just a wonderful experience for
those teenagers just to go out there.

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And, and I'm sure.

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That that planted a seed in some of those,
you know, this is, you know, excellent.

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You know, I may consider
now I'm going to an HBCU.

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Yes.

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Those are the types of things that I
want to do is, you know, expose, you

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know, teenagers to, you know, You know,
just life, you know, uh, take them on

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college tours locally and nationally.

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And I, I'm even, uh, and I'm, I'm, I'm
thinking big now, but I'm even perhaps

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maybe want to expand their horizon
by taking them, um, internationally.

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You'd be surprised how much, uh,
teenagers grow by Learning and

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discovering other parts of the world.

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Exactly.

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Exactly.

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That's, that's what I'm doing, but I'm
at the infancy stage, but I tend to, once

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I retire now from my full time position
education, I can, you know, now more time.

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Well, please, please keep us informed.

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Seriously, because I think, um, um, uh,
everything you're saying, I completely

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agree with, um, and what's particularly
unique and special, I think, is

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that, uh, you're an African American.

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American male professional who's given
back and, and even though it doesn't

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matter who the students are, though,
the race doesn't matter, but, but you

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don't see that a lot is what I'm seeing.

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Um, and I, I went to an HBCU before
going to Yale Medical and, and there's

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no question that it was beneficial to me.

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Different environment,
different everything.

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Yes.

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But was clearly, I went to Tennessee State
and Nashville and clearly I, I learned

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things from there, uh, that maybe I.

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I wouldn't have learned
at Yale and vice versa.

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So, so that there's
always a benefit there.

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Uh, but just the fact that you were
actually doing something, you're not

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just talking about it, you were taking an
affirmative step, as we say in the law to

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get stuff done, I think is extraordinary
and you've already planned stuff out

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and we will do whatever we can here
at healthy, wealth and wise podcasts.

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Group, uh, to help you.

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Uh, you can come back at different
stages if you like, you know, once

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you launch your website or whatever.

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And we can do a podcast
on that particular stage.

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But please see us as oh, wonderful
as your e your eternal partners

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as part of the brotherhood, uh, to
help you do what your Oh, wonderful.

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Absolutely.

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Absolutely.

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And we will make that public
commitment to you right now.

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All right.

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I didn't know this was going to happen
because I didn't know what you would do.

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But I think, I think the opportunities
are so rare, you know, that, that,

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that when we see something positive
and we see someone doing something

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good, that we should all help.

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You know, because we all need that, you
know, it really does take a village.

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I think Hilary said that
or somebody said that.

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It really does take a
village to get things done.

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And, um, uh, what I've learned
that, uh, when I was growing up

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and I wasn't sure about this and
that, but there's nothing wrong.

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People would help me, you know,
people, I didn't know it would help

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me, you know, different colors,
different races on and on and on.

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And so I said, okay, that that's how
I want to be able to give it back.

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And so when I hear leaders like
yourself, lay it out your vision that

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you're already implementing, uh, we, we
were clearly line up, uh, behind that.

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Wonderful.

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Wonderful.

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And I, I appreciate that too, because, uh,
you know, I love, uh, the fact The podcast

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and the work that you and Jesse doing
with regards to healthy, wealthy and wise.

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And one of the things that I noticed
even in our classes, you bring in

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that component of mental health.

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Yes.

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And that is so critical right now.

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Yes.

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And, and as a principal of a school,
you know, since post pandemic, what

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was so critical is addressing the
social emotional needs of young people.

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Yes.

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So I appreciate, you know, your platform
and how, you know, you bring attention

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to that because there are not adults, but
there are teenagers that are struggling

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with

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mental

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health issues.

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Absolutely.

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Uh, social, emotional issues.

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And so, uh, yeah, I've definitely
will reach out because, you know,

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I have mentoring activities.

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There may be a, um, let's say a Saturday
where I'm just going to address social,

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emotional needs or mental health needs.

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Yes.

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Professionals like yourself.

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And other men, you know, on this
podcast that can, you know, speak

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to our young people right now.

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So thank you so much.

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I feel the partnership.

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I feel, you know, uh, you know,
um, joining in with me and our

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cause to, you know, impact, having
students impact our communities.

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Yes.

228
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And that, that's how, you know, God
is in charge because none of this

229
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was planned, you know, but I think
that that's the way things develop.

230
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And it's certainly, you know, Things
I've learned just with our podcast

231
00:12:26,564 --> 00:12:30,885
and Jess and I talk about this all
the time that we have no idea where

232
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things are going, but, but it takes a
life of itself and people just step in

233
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and help you along the way, you know,
sometimes you know them, sometimes

234
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you don't know them, but, but, but
there's a momentum that keeps you going.

235
00:12:44,925 --> 00:12:48,745
But I I'm impressed because you've already
taught me something that I didn't know.

236
00:12:49,085 --> 00:12:53,375
Um, I didn't know about your
501c3 and, and I didn't know

237
00:12:53,415 --> 00:12:54,415
what, what your plans were.

238
00:12:54,635 --> 00:12:56,824
And it's certainly
something we can get behind.

239
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Thank you so much.

240
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I appreciate it.

241
00:12:59,005 --> 00:12:59,335
Yes.

242
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Thank you.

243
00:12:59,805 --> 00:12:59,995
Absolutely.

244
00:13:00,055 --> 00:13:01,305
No, you're very welcome.

245
00:13:01,375 --> 00:13:02,225
You're very welcome.

246
00:13:03,145 --> 00:13:08,995
So if, if you were to, to advise
let's say a group of young people.

247
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Teenagers.

248
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Um, and they say, you know, um, um,
um, um, Brother Higgins, what can we

249
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do to make sure that we're, uh, we
live a healthy life or a happy life?

250
00:13:26,670 --> 00:13:31,040
What have you found, uh, what are
the elements have you found that

251
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have kept you happy and satisfied
and positive because the other thing,

252
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you're a very positive person in
that that comes across as a teacher.

253
00:13:41,135 --> 00:13:45,285
And I think that's, that's extremely
important because many times it's

254
00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:50,035
what you communicate non verbally as
well as what you communicate verbally.

255
00:13:50,325 --> 00:13:54,494
So how would you advise young people
who are just starting out, say, say

256
00:13:54,504 --> 00:13:58,385
middle or late teens and they want to
make sure they're on the right path?

257
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Yes.

258
00:13:59,525 --> 00:14:00,395
So thank you so much.

259
00:14:00,395 --> 00:14:01,915
That's a very, very good question.

260
00:14:02,235 --> 00:14:06,954
And so I believe that, you
know, um, young people today.

261
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Uh, this is a, a, a term, uh, a
term that I don't see too much,

262
00:14:13,855 --> 00:14:18,205
uh, going on in our schools is, and
that's, that, that word respect.

263
00:14:18,535 --> 00:14:18,865
Yes.

264
00:14:18,865 --> 00:14:20,005
And, um, yes.

265
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:25,045
I, I, I, at a early age
learned to respect, uh, those

266
00:14:25,050 --> 00:14:26,724
in position of authority.

267
00:14:26,964 --> 00:14:27,204
Yes.

268
00:14:27,204 --> 00:14:27,234
Uh,

269
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:29,035
it started in the home.

270
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:32,094
You had, you had to respect,
you know, your parents.

271
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Okay.

272
00:14:32,545 --> 00:14:35,395
And so I, I appreciate
the fact that I grew up.

273
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In a home where my parents and
still those principles and values

274
00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:44,749
and you and so definitely respect.

275
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:49,710
You may always agree with, you
know, perhaps maybe someone that's

276
00:14:49,739 --> 00:14:53,029
older, but what they've done.

277
00:14:53,330 --> 00:14:55,550
Gone through and what they, what they did.

278
00:14:55,660 --> 00:14:56,150
Okay.

279
00:14:56,590 --> 00:15:00,730
Um, and so it starts with
the, with respecting them.

280
00:15:01,090 --> 00:15:01,540
Okay.

281
00:15:01,760 --> 00:15:06,740
And then also, uh, it starts with
listening as well, you know, to, to,

282
00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:08,500
to the, to the direction and advice.

283
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:09,215
Okay.

284
00:15:09,215 --> 00:15:09,625
Yes.

285
00:15:09,705 --> 00:15:14,895
Uh, of, of, you know, those who I
use the word been around a block.

286
00:15:15,045 --> 00:15:15,555
Okay.

287
00:15:15,815 --> 00:15:21,294
You know, uh, you'd be surprised
lessons that, that you can learn

288
00:15:21,294 --> 00:15:26,244
from someone that, you know, who
is, um, I use the word more mature

289
00:15:26,245 --> 00:15:27,935
than you, more seasoned than you.

290
00:15:28,405 --> 00:15:33,295
And so, uh, it starts there, you know,
have, have, have respect for, uh,

291
00:15:33,425 --> 00:15:36,915
yourself or for, uh, life in general.

292
00:15:37,525 --> 00:15:42,085
Um, and then I use that terms again
about being a lifelong learner.

293
00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:42,555
Okay.

294
00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:46,375
Discipline yourself to learn.

295
00:15:46,515 --> 00:15:46,965
Okay.

296
00:15:47,595 --> 00:15:52,955
And, and, and I, I, I, I, if you put
those, I think Those two together.

297
00:15:53,015 --> 00:15:53,515
Okay.

298
00:15:53,885 --> 00:15:57,325
Then, you know, uh, doors
will open up for you.

299
00:15:57,495 --> 00:15:58,035
Okay.

300
00:15:58,455 --> 00:16:04,235
Um, you look at, you know, again, I, I,
my, all of my adult life has been in,

301
00:16:04,244 --> 00:16:08,934
in, in the field of education and what's
happening in our classrooms today is

302
00:16:08,994 --> 00:16:15,135
that, um, students, they don't respect
the teachers anymore and, and, and, and,

303
00:16:15,165 --> 00:16:19,545
and I'm not to say that all teachers are,
you know, You know, one of the things

304
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:26,115
that I pride myself on is, um, treating
people respectfully and professionally.

305
00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:26,605
Yes.

306
00:16:26,635 --> 00:16:34,524
And there's times I had to address as
a principal, um, perhaps a teacher,

307
00:16:34,724 --> 00:16:39,215
and perhaps maybe how, how could
you have Handle this differently.

308
00:16:39,505 --> 00:16:39,905
Yes,

309
00:16:39,955 --> 00:16:43,455
this should never be in a situation
where, because when you're a teacher

310
00:16:43,455 --> 00:16:48,445
in a classroom, you're the adult
authority figure in that class, and

311
00:16:48,485 --> 00:16:52,895
you should be able to deescalate
any situation in that classroom.

312
00:16:52,895 --> 00:16:53,449
But

313
00:16:53,449 --> 00:16:58,989
students, they, they, they
come to school with a mindset.

314
00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:01,569
Well, you know, he didn't respect me.

315
00:17:01,630 --> 00:17:02,829
I'm not gonna respect him.

316
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:03,699
Okay.

317
00:17:04,079 --> 00:17:10,129
So I, as a leader of a school, I, I
address my staff by saying to ensure that

318
00:17:10,129 --> 00:17:13,909
you have respect for those students that
are walking through your door every day.

319
00:17:14,270 --> 00:17:17,450
Yes, they'll respect you
when, when, and, and, and at.

320
00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:19,520
And at that point, now
they're ready to learn.

321
00:17:19,899 --> 00:17:23,290
They're ready to receive instructions
that they know that you care about them.

322
00:17:23,290 --> 00:17:24,700
They know that you respect them.

323
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,050
And so that's how I, I, I believe I, I was
successful as an administrator because.

324
00:17:29,645 --> 00:17:34,305
I respected those who were above me
and also those who, you know, were

325
00:17:34,435 --> 00:17:36,525
under me and I think important.

326
00:17:37,115 --> 00:17:38,715
I think to this day that works.

327
00:17:38,715 --> 00:17:41,354
And then what I've learned
is that you have to go first.

328
00:17:41,665 --> 00:17:43,554
You know, you can't say,
well, I'm going to do so.

329
00:17:43,554 --> 00:17:48,425
And so once he wants, he respects
me and whatever leaders go first.

330
00:17:48,915 --> 00:17:53,705
We just go first and say, if I want you to
respect me, I've got to respect you first.

331
00:17:55,205 --> 00:17:59,455
Because if, if, if that's the direction
things are going, I, I agree with

332
00:17:59,455 --> 00:18:03,584
you completely because if many times,
if you don't respect others, many

333
00:18:03,585 --> 00:18:05,405
times they don't respect themselves.

334
00:18:05,765 --> 00:18:10,445
And if they don't respect themselves,
then they take unnecessary risks that

335
00:18:10,595 --> 00:18:14,775
then proves them right in a negative
way, you know, somebody told them,

336
00:18:14,955 --> 00:18:18,014
you will never amount to anything or
you will blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

337
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:21,075
And they have that message in their head.

338
00:18:21,964 --> 00:18:25,794
And that's why I tell parents, be
careful what you say to your children.

339
00:18:27,395 --> 00:18:28,135
Discipline them.

340
00:18:28,145 --> 00:18:31,905
Nothing wrong with that, but
never attack their character.

341
00:18:31,905 --> 00:18:35,594
Never tell them they're bad people
because there are many times we grew

342
00:18:35,595 --> 00:18:38,944
up believing that, well, you know,
my mommy told me I was a bad person.

343
00:18:39,215 --> 00:18:40,915
So blah, blah, blah type thing.

344
00:18:41,135 --> 00:18:43,554
Uh, but no, I, I
completely agree with you.

345
00:18:44,235 --> 00:18:44,475
Yeah.

346
00:18:44,985 --> 00:18:48,834
And you brought up something too,
that I would, I often say, whenever

347
00:18:48,874 --> 00:18:54,370
I Uh, as a classroom teacher and
also, but I was a disciplinary in my

348
00:18:54,530 --> 00:18:58,899
most of my, uh, years in education
was, uh, uh, serving as an assistant

349
00:18:58,939 --> 00:19:00,340
principal in charge of discipline.

350
00:19:00,570 --> 00:19:04,709
So you can imagine the many, uh,
parent conferences I've had with,

351
00:19:04,719 --> 00:19:08,419
you know, parent and student
there, but I will always use the

352
00:19:08,419 --> 00:19:11,219
phrase that, you know what, ma'am?

353
00:19:11,715 --> 00:19:15,235
Um, your son is not a bad person.

354
00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:16,985
He just made a bad decision.

355
00:19:17,285 --> 00:19:17,775
There you go.

356
00:19:17,775 --> 00:19:19,005
He made a bad choice.

357
00:19:19,475 --> 00:19:22,914
You know, and so I want to
instill that into that child

358
00:19:22,924 --> 00:19:24,554
that you're not a bad individual.

359
00:19:24,605 --> 00:19:24,845
Okay.

360
00:19:24,845 --> 00:19:25,245
Yes.

361
00:19:25,275 --> 00:19:25,485
Yeah.

362
00:19:25,485 --> 00:19:30,485
What you did was you made a bad decision
that now causing you perhaps maybe to

363
00:19:30,525 --> 00:19:35,405
be, you know, receive some type of a
consequence, but you're not a bad person.

364
00:19:35,965 --> 00:19:39,245
And, and, and, and, and that has to be,
like you said, you don't tell someone,

365
00:19:39,264 --> 00:19:40,495
Oh, you'll never amount to anything.

366
00:19:40,504 --> 00:19:42,034
You're, you're a bad person.

367
00:19:42,314 --> 00:19:46,654
But, and, and so that's what I tried
to, you know, ensure that I demonstrated

368
00:19:46,655 --> 00:19:51,804
that as a leader and also those who,
you know, I, I led in, in, in education.

369
00:19:52,705 --> 00:20:00,415
We want to thank you, uh, for spending
some of your very valuable time, uh, on a

370
00:20:00,425 --> 00:20:03,115
Saturday morning to come and talk to us.

371
00:20:03,145 --> 00:20:06,855
Uh, you clearly, uh, educated
me about some things that I

372
00:20:06,855 --> 00:20:08,305
had, I didn't have a clue about.

373
00:20:08,654 --> 00:20:13,615
Um, and again, I see an opportunity
where, where, where we can definitely

374
00:20:13,615 --> 00:20:20,165
work with you in whatever, um, um, process
you, you would like, uh, to assist you

375
00:20:20,165 --> 00:20:21,865
in doing the good work or something.

376
00:20:21,955 --> 00:20:23,785
Good work that, that you are doing.

377
00:20:24,115 --> 00:20:28,675
Um, and so please feel free at
any time you want to come back,

378
00:20:28,885 --> 00:20:32,665
uh, just let us know and, and that
that door is always open to you.

379
00:20:33,175 --> 00:20:35,815
Thank you for listening to this
episode of the Healthy, wealthy,

380
00:20:35,815 --> 00:20:37,915
and Wise podcast with Dr.

381
00:20:37,915 --> 00:20:40,645
William t Choctaw, md, jd.

382
00:20:41,095 --> 00:20:44,665
Be sure to check out other great
episodes covering areas of health,

383
00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:49,705
wealth, and wisdom@twwp.com.

384
00:20:49,945 --> 00:20:51,685
And while you're there,
be sure to check out.

385
00:20:51,955 --> 00:20:55,735
Books, blogs, and other literature
in your preferred format.

386
00:20:56,095 --> 00:21:01,345
And don't forget to leave a review,
subscribe, share, and support the podcast.

387
00:21:01,585 --> 00:21:05,095
That's at t wwp.com.

388
00:21:05,395 --> 00:21:09,265
You've been listening to the Healthy,
wealthy, and Wise Podcast with Dr.

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00:21:09,265 --> 00:21:11,185
William t CHOC talk, MD D.